Any Handwriting Analyzors out there?

The OC Fair boasts of many pleasurable and entertaining activities…photos to come later…including the personality analysis based totally on your signature (and astro sign). Best $3 I’ve ever spent! The italics are mine.

(Note* For Your Fun and Entertainment Only*)

The report starts with my personality analysis:
- You need a pat on the back occasionally. I do appreciate when someone notices my efforts
- You are sometimes jealous and possessive. What? Me? Never!
- You have a tendency to misplace things. I’ll give the computer room for 5% error—I’m actually pretty organized most of the time
- You like to be busy in some useful work. Yes, please!
- You have difficulty in expressing your true feelings. If there is anything that could sum me up in one sentence…
- You have a talent for making the best of any situation. Check
- You are very romantic under the right circumstances. Check - You have a practical look on life. Check, Check
- You have a tendency to worry needlessly. Check, check, check
- There is a corner of your heart that no one will ever see. Check, check, check, check, check, check...hope this isn't always true.
- You like to set your own pace and limits in life. I really don’t like it when someone else tries to tell me what I want or who I am…totally gets on my nerves
- You never hesitate, even when the going is rough. Bring it!

Next up—Weird facts about the past Millennium that I will not waste my time to include here.

My horoscope:
Gemini (The Twins—yes we are). All things are fresh and fascinating for The Twins. They often possess the enthusiasm and optimism of a child. Routine is boring and boring in not allowed. With a restless imagination and keen intellect, life must be lived to the fullest. The Gemini game of life is best played with entertaining teammates and swift moves. A Twin wants to know the motivation and cause behind everyone and everything they encounter. Geminis are expressive folk and are often gifted with their hands. Great storytellers, they make life a little more interesting for the rest of us. Geminis are usually affectionate, kind, generous, and thoughtful. They are attractive and interesting people who know how to get their own needs met. They are known to be honest, straight forward and without guile. They are what they are and usually have no problem admitting their failings (unfortunately). Geminis are quick witted, charming and imaginative companions. If you can fulfill a Gemini’s needs on a mental, emotional and romantic level, you’ll find a solid, enduring person beneath the charm. Gemini parents allow their children to express who they are and nurture intellectual interests.

Gemini in the New Millennium:
During the first decade of the Millennium (still have two years left!) any changes you make that have no real purpose will leave you feeling empty. The millennium will be about prioritizing, focusing and empowering yourself. With your quick wit and communication skills, you are a natural for taking advantage of the booming telecommunication and media industries. Be careful not to take on too much and don’t procrastinate where health is concerned (maybe it's time I purchased some heatlth insurance?).

Lucky Day: Wednesday
Lucky Numbers: 5, 9, 11 (what are “lucko” numbers? 4, 30, 44, 16, 32, 12)
Color: Yellow
Gemini Plants: Yarrow, Lavendar
Gemini Attractions: to Virgo, Libra, Sagittarius

So...?